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Newsletter Archive

Issue 21

--- THE NEWBIE CLUB INSIDER Issue 21 February 22, 2001

Written by Tom Glander, 
and Joe Robson,

Subscription info is at the bottom.


-------The Ultimate Gift For A Newbie - And Yourself!

Since we started offering our Flagship product 'Windows For
Newbies' on CD ROM, sales have outstripped the Downloadable
version by 12 to 1. It's the very best way to learn how to tame
your PC, and lose all the frustration and aggravation your
present fumblings are causing you. It's in Newbie-Speak, and uses pictures to show you how to tackle the seemingly impossible learning curve. Examine it at But be warned - the sheer volume of the contents may shock you.


<< MENU >>

1. Tom's Thoughts: Nanoseconds and The Big Problem 
2. How to Tell if You're Really Online 
3. Using AOL Just to Connect 
4. Joe's Place .... "A Millionaire At Last" 
5. Linda's Office .... "Don't Take Word's Word For It" 
6. Administrivia


1. --- Tom's Thoughts: Nanoseconds and The Big Problem

Hello {firstname},

I made a major goof last issue when I stated that a nanosecond
was one part of a million, or one-millionth, of a second. The
correct interpretation is one Billionth of a second. So now you
know the nanosecond is even smaller. What's a nanosecond among friends, anyway? Not much. But to your computer, it's a pretty important difference. If stuff happened in millionths of seconds instead of billionths of seconds, we'd be watching the hourglass on our monitors for a lot longer period of time.


One of the biggest problems facing computer users, myself
included, is the lack of support for problems that crop up. When
computers start acting up, what do you do? Who do you turn to?

I wish there were a web site you could go to, and ask any
question about software, hardware, or the Internet, and get a
quick answer back. Wouldn't that be nice? Maybe we'll find
something like that exists, and we can all use it.

A site that wouldn't care if you were using Windows 95 or Windows 2000, didn't care what kind of computer you were using, and didn't care where you bought the stuff. So many customer support types won't help you if you didn't buy your products from them, and I understand the logic behind that. So this would be the Ultimate Help Site that guaranteed an answer within a very short time. That would be cool. Very, very cool.

How much would I pay for help like that? I don't know. But it
would be worth a lot. I'd want it to be an annual subscription
with unlimited help every year. It would have to be manned by a
whole building full of people just answering email questions. Or
have live, "chat" style help, too. I would be willing to pay a
fair amount for that kind of service. I can always dream ....


Introducing.... Linda Johnson! She's an expert in all things
related to Microsoft Office products. Like Word, Excel,
PowerPoint, etc. And she has graciously accepted our offer to
write a tips column that will appear in each issue. So look for
Linda's Office Tips beginning with this issue. She won't be able
to answer questions by email. Sorry. :( Linda is an educator, and
spends her offline time teaching Newbies in the classroom, so she 
knows the ropes.)

Please write to me at and let me know if you enjoy her column. And why not tell me which other subjects you'd like to see covered? Hey, maybe *you're* an expert and would like to try your hand?

Enjoy this issue!


Geek-Speak Buster: Cut and Paste

You can copy text, icons, or groups of icons to new locations
using the Cut and Paste (or Copy and Paste) technique. This also applies to graphics, spreadsheet data, or anything else
considered to be an object. Windows considers the stuff mentioned above as an object, and through the magic of OLE (Object Linking and Embedding) it moves information from one place to another on your hard drive. 

------ Get Smart - Get 'First Website Builder'

For the meager sum of $29.95 you can build your very own first
Website, and there's no need to spend a penny more! This ground breaking product contains 4 - yes 4 - Newbie-Speak ebooks showing you step by step how to Design, Create, Write, Backup, Upload, Automate, and Publicize your own individual Website. Using FREE Software and Graphics. Get your FREE evaluation copy here and you'll also receive a 5 part emailed Web Building tutorial...

2. How to Tell If You're Really Online

If you suffer the slings and arrows of dial-up misfortune, you
have no doubt wondered at times if you're really connected to the Internet or not. Sometimes the little 'connected' icon can be
down in the System Tray (that area to the lower right where the
clock sits) but your modem went on vacation. And didn't tell you.

The easiest way to check whether you're connected is open your web browser and type the address of a known web site. I use a site called to test this. The name is short, and typing is quick. If I'm connected, their page will come up in my
browser. If I'm not connected, I'll get an error message.

3. Using AOL Just to Get Connected

If you use AOL for your Internet connection, you can see a whole lot more of the world using this little secret.

When you dial up AOL, and connect, you're finally left with the
AOL screen. You're not really on the Internet. To get on the Net, you have to click a button that says Internet. Okay, there really is a world outside of AOL that you may me missing.

Once you've logged on to AOL (logging on is Techie-Speak for
entering your username and password) you can minimize the entire AOL interface. Just click the little minus button in the upper right hand corner of your screen. This won't close your
connection. All it does is minimize the window that AOL is using.

Now, once that's minimized, double click the blue "e" or the
ship's steering wheel icon. (The blue "e" is for Internet
Explorer, and the ship's wheel is for Netscape Navigator.)

The browser you selected will load, and then you can simply type an address (known as a URL) into the address line, and click Go, Visit, or whatever it's called, or press the Enter key on your board. That's it! You'll be surfing the web using only the
browser. When you're done, put the browser away, and pop AOL back to its full state.

You never know what you're going to discover outside of the AOL cage. I mean world.


Geek-Speak Buster: Tips.txt

Did you know your computer has all the information you could ever want to know about it's own insides? There's a complete
Geek-Speak handbook on your computer right now. It's called
Tips.txt and you can find it using the Find function. If you need
a complete and immediate tipsheet on using the Find function,
just send a bland email to this address: The Tips.txt file can be opened in
Notepad by double clicking the file once it's located. A lot of
keyboard shortcuts are listed there, but not nearly the
information we've compiled into our little ebooklet named
Keyboard Magic! You can learn a lot more here:


------ Finally. A Totally Newbie-Friendly Unzipper!

Some Zip programs are frustratingly confusing to use. But it's
essential to have one if you're downloading stuff from the Net.
'Unzip Wizard' is so simple it's impossible to go wrong. That's
because it's specifically designed with Newbies in mind. And The
Newbie Club has arranged a special discount for you at this page. So now you can save AND unzip without embarrassment!

4. Joe's Place ..... "A Millionaire At Last"

Hi {firstname}, how's life?

Well, well, well. Looks like things are looking up. I'm getting
so many emails from some very friendly people that I've never
even met. And I'm getting so emotional about it, I choke up.

The milk of human kindness seems to be an overflowing river these days, with so many people offering to help me make a fortune.

Here's just a selection of the offers I've received this week....

"Make over half million dollars every 4 to 5 months from your
home for an investment of only $25 U.S. Dollars expense one time"

I think I'll try $100 worth. That's over $2 million I'll make
this year alone - make that $200 worth!

"Guaranteed - Best FREE Cell Phone Offer On The Planet!"

I'll pass on that one - too techie. But it's kind of them just
the same

>>> 19 MILLION NEW Addresses - Just Released! <<< THE VERY BEST email addresses available anywhere!!

Wow. All I have to do is send out an ad for Keyboard MAGIC! and I'll sell a million of them. Sounds great.

"Natural p***s enlargement -without surgery-!"

Sorry, but I don't need it. Well ........... OK then!

"It only takes an hour of your time to gently rub in our miracle

Boy that sounds great. But won't it make a mess on the sheets?

"TIRED OF WORKING IN A DEAD-END JOB??? WORK @ HOME Start making money with your computer in just 1 hour a day"

Now that's more like it. And I thought I had to really work hard
to do that. Tom and I are doing something wrong somewhere!

"General AOL Lists or other ISPs $200.00 for 1-million e-mails
sent. $400.00 for 3-million e-mails sent. $600.00 for 5-million
e-mails sent. $800.00 for 7-million e-mails sent. $1000.00 for
10-million e-mails sent. WE ALSO HAVE LARGER PACKAGES"

Really? Can I have 1000 just to begin with please? That will make me about $200 a week for starters.

"SKYROCKETING Your Profits Is Our #1 Mission In Life! At Last! A
web site devoted exclusively to helping the "little guy" achieve
ASTOUNDING RESULTS with their eBusiness. We'll show you how to turn your website into a gigantic digital vacuum cleaner that

Sounds easy enough, but I'm a bit confused now. Will I be
selling Space Shuttle Seats - or Vacuum Cleaners?

"Part Timers Wanted!"

That's more like it. I have about 10 minutes a week to spare.

"Hurry!!! This won't last long!"

Shucks - I missed it!

"You can LAWFULLY and LEGALLY not pay income taxes for the rest of your LIFE!!! PLUS MAKE AN EXTRA $10,000 PER MONTH IN YOUR SPARE TIME!"

Now that sounds just right for me. Photocopying $100 bills on a
desert island in the middle of the Pacific. I'll take him up on
that. I'll need a power generator of course.

OK, time to get serious.

I've even seen Internet Ads saying that the Newbie Market is a
huge one, and they're prime customers for almost anything. What
they really mean is they want to rip off those who haven't yet
gained enough experience to see through their scams. So they rip
off whoever they can, and wait for the next batch of Newbies to
wander into their net.

Quite frankly, it makes me absolutely sick to my stomach!

I know I went on about this last week, but believe me, some of
these people are not as obvious as the writers of those silly Ads
I've just shown you. Many of them are extremely clever at what
they do. And they're nothing more than thieves in the night.

Do yourself a favor and surf around the many sites that devote
their time to exposing scams. Go to the Go to the Google search
engine at and type in 'scams'. I've just
tried it and they came up with 246,000 places to visit!

You can make a start by going to and scrolling down the list of scams on the left hand side.

That'll keep you going for a week!

But whatever else you do {firstname} ...

Keep smilin'


P.S. A number of people have written to Tom and I asking if
Gary White's 'Newbie Guide' is connected to The Newbie Club. The answer is a great big, massive, humongous NO! We have, never will have, and have absolutely no intention of being associated in any way with it. Plain?


------------ It's MAGIC!

In the 14 days since it was released, our latest eBooklet,
'Keyboard MAGIC!' has been bought by HUNDREDS and HUNDREDS of people just like you. Don't let ignorance of your keyboard stifle your creativity and steal away your time. When you discover how much you can really achieve with that humble beige tray of keys, you'll be astounded. Click and prepare yourself for a MAJOR revelation! Hey, it's ONLY $9.95!

5. Linda's Office Corner. "Don't Take Word's Word For It"

Hi {firstname}. Now take it easy on me because this is my first
time ;-) That's the default setting, anyway.

------- Changing the Default Font in Microsoft Word

When you first open MS Word you see a brand new blank document, which is really a template called, which is where all the default settings are stored. If you make any global changes they will be changed in this template so you won't have to make the change every time you start a new document.

So, let's get working and make a global change (sounds kinda like nuclear warfare, but don't let it scare you). Let's change that boring font MS Word has decided we should use.

Click on the Format menu and select "Font". In this box, you will
see a list of all of the fonts installed in your computer. As
you click on each of them, you will see a preview of how that
font looks in the box below. Pick one you like. Then do the
same with the font style (bold, italic, etc.) and the font size
(font sizes are measured in points and 72 points is one inch).

Under the list of fonts, there's a dropdown box that says "Font
Color" and you can drop this down and select any color you want. (If you don't see the exact color you want, click on the button below the colors that says "More Colors" and go crazy.) Once you see something in that preview box that pleases your eye, click on the button at the bottom that says "Default", then click OK.

Linda Johnson teaches Microsoft Office and more. Visit her web site here:


FREE Newbie Club Courses - by email. Just send a blank email for
the course you need. It's delivered every few days to your
desktop - automatically! (AOL users must remove the "mailto:" part of the address.)

Backing up your stuff:

Organize your files:

10 PC tips:

Finding files:

Take the load off your PC:

See how easy it is to get info to people? Get your own FREE
autoresponders at


Got your FREE exclusive Newbie Club eBooks yet?

"Guide To The Internet - An Overview" features the combined
advice of 18 of the Internet's most successful marketers.

"Scientific Advertising On The Internet" contains the world
famous Claude C. Hopkins' Classic, (currently being sold at
Amazon for $11.96) plus observations and Copywriting Tutorials by
Newbie Club co-founder Joe Robson, who is also co-author of the
blockbuster "Make Your Words Sell" with Ken Evoy. Details at

Get both Newbie Club books FREE from The Newbie Club Academy at


It's the ultimate guide for the not-so-newbie, that will get your
PC up to the very peak of condition. 'Registry For Newbies' is
our Newbie-Speak ebook that covers all the Techie stuff you need to know to really boost your knowledge of your PC - and your performance. Details here ...


That's it. If you learned something new, that's a good thing. If
you already knew everything here, send me an email so I can tap into your brain power. Until next time, keep one eye on the
monitor and the other on your keyboard. You can leave a hand on the mouse.


6. Administrivia 

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The TNC INSIDER is a production of The Newbie Club(TM) and is owned by Roglan International, whose partners are 
Tom Glander and 
Joe Robson

(C) 2001 The Newbie Club(TM) All Rights Reserved

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