Newbie Club Home

Master Menu

Become an Affiliate

TNC Autoresponder

TNC Web Hosting

TNC Web Bundle

TNC Forum

Free TNC Survey

Free TNC Guest

First Website

for Newbies

for Newbies

Keyboard MAGIC!


DigiCam MAGIC!

for Newbies

Free eBooks

Search this Site


Newsletter Archive

Issue 31

--- THE NEWBIE CLUB INSIDER Issue 31 May 24th, 2001

Written by Tom Glander,
and Joe Robson,

You receive the INSIDER because you... 
+Subscribed to it at our Website,
+Are a Newbie Club Member, or
+Are a Newbie Club Affiliate. 

Your membership details are...

Name ==> %name%
Address ==> %email%

Manage your membership information here:

Your email will go to a Robot! Use the email addresses given
in this newsletter for prompt human attention.


Buy One - Get The Other One Free!

Cure your PC rage!. This Newbie Club series of 52 picture-driven
tutorials will end your frustration for ever. See why someone
once said that it should be included in every new PC sold. Hey,
when you Buy the CD, the download version comes FREE. So you can
send the CD to a friend! Sounds like a good deal to me.


<< MENU >>

==> 1. Tom's Thoughts: "Secure Graduation Ceremonies"
==> 2. Tutorial ... "Feeding PC Santa a Cookie"
==> 3. Joe's Place ... "Surprise A Friend"
==> 4. Tutorial ... "Making ScanDisk Behave with a Switch"
==> 5. Linda's Office ... "Sort Your Bills"
==> 6. Administrivia ... "Nothing trivial when it's needed."


-------- Unsolicited Testimonial

THANK YOU!!! Your Newbie Clinic solved my computer problem.

Most service people in this area were mostly concerned how much
they could make. You saved me money and very important, saved me
loss of time on my computer. I will spend money with you on your
programs. I believe your offers to be much, much more valuable
than what you charge for them. I'm unsubscribing with most of the
free offers I joined. I TRUST YOU...


(email address with-held for privacy reasons)

If you haven't signed up for Free Membership yet, just go to and enter your first name and email 
address. The amount of Free stuff and help in the NEW site is
absolutely astonishing. Go NOW to see why the Net is buzzing 
about the most information packed and Newbie-Friendliest site
on earth!

1. --- Tom's Thoughts: Secure Graduation Ceremonies

Hello %name%,

Graduation is around the corner for us. My youngest, Erika, and
my little techie child, has successfully completed 8th grade.
She'll participate in ceremonies Thursday night and has promised
not to set up a web cam and broadcast the proceedings on the Net.
This would violate her school's privacy policy. She will sing,
however, along with a friend. No word on whether a recording will
be available as a download.

Speaking of privacy, are you sure nobody is peeking inside your
computer while you're online? Is this even possible, you ask?
Yes, it is VERY possible.

Who's most vulnerable to these prying perps? Anyone on a cable
modem or other "always on" connection. If you have cable or
DSL, better click on over to Zone Alarm's site and download
their personal firewall. We use the system here in the TNC Lab
and it's impenetrable. That means NOBODY can get into our
stuff! Click ==> And by the way, should
you think that your dial-up connection is safe, think again.
You may also want this protection as well. Better safe than
sorry, eh?


Are you looking for someone to host your new web site? Thinking
about moving sites, or doing your very first one? Maybe you've
just had it with lack of service, or your domain is expiring.
Whatever. I just spoke with a gentleman who was thrilled to be
moving his "stuff" to If you're not
pleased with your current host, consider us. We'll treat you
better than right. We'll LOVE you! And I'll personally set up
your account! Click ==> now for
a quick look around.


Yes, the above is my thought. And on that note, I'm going to
finish with a quick plug for a splendid article from our
favorite site. If you need inspiration, or simply feel a little
down in the dumps right now, let your spirits soar with a quick
look at our Inspirations page.

I find that by feeding my mind with positive, powerful thoughts,
I can really do wonders for my own attitude. So use the most
powerful force known to mankind (that force is something you
learned in grade school -- your ABCs) and experience the words
on the Inspirations page...

Click ==> and absorb!


Are you saving money? Are you educating yourself? Are you
taking the proverbial bull by the horns? I hope so. I encourage
you to find a few minutes a day to explore the site. There's a
world of wisdom awaiting you...

And that's all I have to say about that! (With apologies to
Forest Gump.)

Take care,



Geek-Speak Buster: "HTTP"
You see this in your browser's address bar all the time.
What the hay does it mean? It's just a bloomin' bit of
techie-speak for the very inner workings of the Internet.
It stands for Hyper Text Transfer Protocol. If you know
anything about protocol at all, then you understand that
part. The Web uses a protocol to transfer information
between your browser (your web page viewer gizmo) and the
computers that house that info. The pages you view are
'hypertext' documents. Put it all together, and you've
got the "easily excitable linked text transfer system"
or Hyper Text Transfer Protocol.


-------- How To Build Your Very Own First Website.

The Newbie Club Website Builder is a 4 volume library written
by 3 successful Internet Marketers and a NEWBIE!. The result is
a stunning Newbie-Speak publication that details everything you
need to know to create, write, design, automate, backup, promote
and publish your own first Website. All in 2 days using FREE
programs and graphics! This blockbuster blows away the myths
once and for all. Click here for
FREE TRIAL and FREE 5 part emailed course.

2. Tutorial: Hey PC Santa, You Want a Cookie?

Would you leave an Internet Cookie out for Santa come December
24? He may thank you and leave a new laptop under your tree.
What's this got to do with anything? Everything!

Cookies are yummy. We love them. We eat them by the billions.
Yea, trillions. And our computers do the same thing. Nearly
all commercial, and many non-commercial sites you visit feed
your computer a cookie.

Okay, what's a cookie, really? It's a funky name for an itty
bitty teeny tiny text file. Want to see what a cookie looks
like? This one has no chocolate chips, but your computer loves
it anyway. I went into the cookie jar on my computer's hard
drive and pulled out a cookie that was planted by my favorite
web site, and it looks like this:


Okay, now you know that a cookie is a text file. It's a bit
of "code" that helps a web site know who you are. A perfect
example is Newbie Club. When you became a Member, your computer
accepted our cookie. It's on your hard drive right now! And
it's not malicious, it's not bad, and it's not going to hurt
anything. It won't phone home and it won't grow mold. It's
a good cookie. Its job is to identify you to our database when
you come back for a visit, and greet you by your Name. And
that's all it does.

Can a cookie phone home? Can it report on you? Can it give
away sensitive details about you to anyone who asks? The answer
is a resounding NO! Cookies only work with the web sites that
set them. The Newbie Club Cookie is totally useless to anyone
but The Newbie Club.

By the way, you can disable the cookies on your computer if
you want to. It's not the easiest thing to do, and since this
generally causes more confusion than it solves, I'll not spend
any time on it. By "disable" I mean make your computer refuse
to accept cookies.

I hope this tutorial has set your mind at ease. Or maybe it
has stirred up a whole host of troubling thoughts. In any case,
if you've started thinking, that's a good thing. And I'll have
done my job again!


So you're not such a Newbie after all? Like to know what makes
Windows act the way it does? Then this Newbie Club ebook will
give you a quick, easy understanding of your PC's Brain. It's
called 'The Registry For Newbies' and you can read all about it
See Techie-Speak translated into Newbie-Speak by the very best
Techie-Translator on the Web!


3. Joe's Place ... "Surprise A Friend"

Hi there %name% How's things?

Want to send someone a Virtual Greetings Card? If you've never
done it before, then use The Newbie Club's FREE service. All you
do is go to this page and choose
the design you want. Type in your message, your friend's name and
email address, and your name and email. Then click Send!

Your friend gets an email from you saying there's a Card waiting
for them at The Newbie Club site. And if they wish, they can
send one back to you. It's cool, it's simple and it's Fun. And
there's no charge.

Just another Newbie-Friendly gesture from Tom and me.

Did you visit last week to read
about the Reno Get Together in September?

It's going to be a heck of a weekend, and their great list of
Big Name speakers will be giving away some excellent advice for
Home Business start ups and owners. Tom and I are contributing
our 2 cents worth, and I promise you, this is a get together with
BIG difference.....

It's gonna be a Shindig!

Anyway, the reason I mentioned it is because in the past few days
they've decided to offer a heavily discounted 2nd ticket to a
or partner. Seems they've realized that people like me aren't
allowed to have fun without our spouses! Oh glory days :-)

So if you've been waiting until nearer the date before you
register, I advise you to get over there now and put down your
deposit. Then surprise your partner with a casual "Oh by the way
honey, I'm off to Reno in September - care to join me?".
All is revealed at

I had some friends call in unexpectedly the other day. It was
really great to see them again. Then came trouble. As my wife was
preparing a meal for us, she remembered that I'd only succeeded
in assembling 2 of the 6 flat pack dining chairs we bought
recently. Well 2 months ago actually!

"You what?" said I, "You want chairs as WELL as a table?"
Sometimes the workings of the female mind escapes me.
(Hey, no emails about Political Correctness OK?)

I suggested we all sit on the boxes containing the bits and
pieces, but she didn't seem to hear me. The old ear wax problem
again I think.

No problem, it was a beautiful day so we all ate outside in the
garden. Wasps, bugs, creepy crawlies and sinister black looks
were everywhere. Two people burned their arms on the hot plastic
furniture, and one of the children decided to cool off in the
pond with the fish. The frogs quickly deserted the pond and
created panic amongst the ladies. But it sure beat spending
three days putting those chairs together.

Anyway, it looks like I don't have to tackle the assembly project
until winter sets in. By that time I may have translated the
'simple assembly' instructions!

Keep smilin' %firstname%

PS. I forgot to mention the new ebook I'm working on. It's
called "How To Arrest Catatonic Shock In Pond Fish".
Should be a best seller round our neighborhood!


------ Finally. A Totally Newbie-Friendly Unzipper!

Some Zip programs are frustratingly confusing to use. But it's
essential to have one if you're downloading stuff from the Net.
'Unzip Wizard' is so simple it's impossible to go wrong. That's
because it's specifically designed with Newbies in mind. And
The Newbie Club has arranged a special discount for you at this
page. So now you can save AND unzip without embarrassment! This is a stunner!


---------------- "MAGIC!" ----------------

Many people believe their magic mouse is the be-and-end-all of
modern technology. Click this, click that, right click, left
click, double click, somersault and middle click - magic! And
who can blame them? After all they've never been shown a better
way! But the savvy one's learn all about those mysterious
keyboard keys, and their lives - and creativity - are
transformed. Read about The Newbie Club's latest best seller
'Keyboard MAGIC! and transform your computer habits - it's so
easy! Prepare for lift-off at

4. Tutorial: Make ScanDisk Behave

You do scan your hard drive regularly for errors, don't you?
Okay, good. Now, there are some kind of cool things you can
do to make is scan the way you want it to. So here we go...

ScanDisk is used to look for errors on your hard drive. It
runs whenever you don't exit Windows correctly, and may run
for other reasons, too. You start it the long way by going
to Start > Programs > Accessories > System Tools > ScanDisk.

The fast way is to click Start, Run, and type 'scandskw'
without the apostrophes. Before you hit the Enter key or
click OK, add something called a 'switch'. A switch is a
way to tell ScanDisk to do something different. The switch
is a letter or word following a forward slash ( "/" ). Here's
a list of secret switches for you:

'SCANDSKW /SILENT' will make everything run without any
input from you. You'll have to click OK and that's it. No
selections, no options.

'SCANDSKW /N' will allow you to get down to business right
away, with no prompting or clicking necessary...

'SCANDSKW /A' will automatically select your fixed (hard)
drives for scanning and possible repairing... and...

'SCANDSKW /P' enables Scandisk's preview mode, which will
keep it from making any necessary changes to your system.

It's a SNAP, really. Or a silent nap for you who are weary of
this tutorial.

Remember, ScanDisk should be used regularly. I suggest you let
if correct errors automatically. Just let it do its thing, fix
stuff, and let you get on with your life.


Confused By Your Digital Camera?

DigiCam MAGIC! from The Newbie Club blows away the techie-talk
once and for all. Learn how to create stunning images from your
technological box of tricks with this brilliant Newbie-Speak
publication. So dust off your DigiCam and start having Fun.
Read all about it at

5. Linda's Office Corner: "Sort Your Bills"

Sorting Those Bills.

I know tax time is over and we have all breathed a sigh of
relief, but it's time to think about this year's taxes and how
to organize our financial stuff so it's not such a headache
next year. MS Excel can be a big help to us in getting all
those payouts organized and sorted.

Before I started using Excel, I would toss all of my receipts
into an envelope and at the end of the year, I would have to go
through this huge mass of paper and organize it into piles.
Advertising expenses on the sofa, donations on the coffee table,
medical bills on the floor, office supply receipts on the dog
bed. Oh well, you get the picture (and I bet some of you have
been there/done that!) Then, I would have to go through each
pile and organize them by date and, of course, all the pieces
of paper were different sizes and shapes and I would constantly
be dropping them and it was a total mess and took HOURS!

Not now. Now the whole process takes less than an hour. Try
this example.

Let's assume we are using the above mentioned categories and we
give them simple codes like AD, DO, MB, AND OS. In Excel, we
enter the dates of these receipts going down in column A, then
the dollar amounts in column B, and the codes we made up in
column C. In the first row of our spreadsheet, we type DATE
at the top of column A, AMOUNT at the top of column B, and CODE
at the top of column C. Once all the stuff is typed in, simply
highlight all of your data by dragging across it from left to
right, then down (be sure to include the heading names). Then
go to the Data menu and choose "Sort".

In the first box at the top, choose "CODE" from the dropdown
choices and make sure "Ascending" is selected, then choose
"DATE" in the second dropdown box and also "Ascending" and
click on OK.

Voila! There's all your expenses sorted by category and in
order by date within each category. How simple is that?

Next tip will tell you how to filter out specific parts of this
data when you only want to see certain parts of it, so save
those sample worksheets for next week!

Hang in there!

Linda Johnson is an MS Office personal tutor, with a terrific
Website which is now better than ever. Check it out at


Microsoft Word - it's for typing letters isn't it? Hardly.
Flyers, posters, reports, greeting cards, letters, html email,
and even Web pages are much easier to produce, if you fully
understand how to exploit WORD to its maximum. So trust The
Newbie Club to come up with a stunning Newbie-Speak eBooklet,
bursting with screen captures, exercises and pictures that make
the World's favorite program crystal clear - and FUN! Read about
it here: and prepare to be amazed
at the low price of just $9.95!


FREE Newbie Club Courses - by email. Just send a blank email
for the course you need. It's delivered every few days to your
desktop - automatically!

First Website Builder 5 part course:

Backing up your stuff:

Organize your files:

10 PC tips:

Finding files:

Take the load off your PC:

See how easy it is to get info to people? Get your own FREE
autoresponders at


Got your FREE exclusive Newbie Club eBooks yet?

"Guide To The Internet - An Overview" features the combined
advice of 18 of the Internet's most successful marketers.

"Scientific Advertising On The Internet" contains the world
famous Claude C. Hopkins' Classic, (currently being sold at
Amazon for $11.96) plus observations and Copywriting Tutorials
by Newbie Club co-founder Joe Robson, who is also co-author of
the blockbuster "Make Your Words Sell" with Ken Evoy. Details

Get both Newbie Club books FREE from The Newbie Club Academy at


Need a Trustworthy Web Host for your Web site? The Newbie Club
has exactly what you're looking for. With features and benefits
too numerous to list, we have 3 options to choose from. So
whether you're a Newbie or a Pro you'll be blown away by what we
have to offer - and we talk in Newbie-Speak! It's all explained


That'll do it for now!

All the best,


6. Administrivia

To make changes to your details, such as updating your name or
email address, or unsubscribing (huh?), visit your management

Click==> and check on
your details now! You should see your info listed as ...

Name==> %name%
Address==> %email%

Back issues of the INSIDER are found here...

... and we beg - sorry, encourage - you to forward this email to
someone you know. Just don't spam anyone with it!

The TNC INSIDER is a publication of The Newbie Club and is
owned by Roglan International LLC, whose partners are
Tom Glander and
Joe Robson

(C) 2001 The Newbie Club(TM) All Rights Reserved

Back to Archive Index

Help a friend learn more 
Click here to recommend
this page.

Home | Tutorials | e-BookStore | Computer Clinic | About

Copyright 2001 Roglan International LLC All Rights Reserved