--- THE NEWBIE CLUB INSIDER Issue 37 July 5th 2001
Written by Tom Glander, mailto:firstname.lastname@example.org
and Joe Robson, mailto:email@example.com
You receive the INSIDER as a benefit of membership in
The Newbie Club. Your membership details are at the end
of this newsletter.
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response must be directed to the addresses listed above.
Buy One - Get The Other One Free!
Cure your PC rage!. This Newbie Club series of 52 picture-driven
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when you Buy the CD, the download version comes FREE. So you can
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<< MENU >>
==> 1. Tom's Thoughts ... "Artificial Intelligence"
==> 2. Tutorial ... "Image Discovery"
==> 3. Joe's Place ... "Who's Boss Around Here?"
==> 4. Tutorial ... "Make Your Monitor Comfortable to View"
==> 5. Linda's Office ... "Animation"
==> 6. Administration ... "Stuff about your account"
-------------------- Unsolicited Testimonial --------------
I ordered the new Keyboard (Magic) this a.m. and it is just
what I needed. This is absolutely great. As someone who had never
used a computer until a couple of years ago, I find I spend so
much time just trying to figure out how to do something. You
guys are doing a terrific job and this is something everyone
Sandra (email address with held for privacy reasons)
Why is she so excited? Find out at http://newbieclub.com/keyboard
==> 1. --- Tom's Thoughts ... "Artificial Intelligence"
If we could create a machine that could love, what would we do
Enter the Steven Spielberg film, A.I. (Artificial Intelligence).
I just finished the movie. When the last scene faded, and
David fell asleep (a real trick for a machine, or 'mecha' as
they're called in the movie) and the lights in the theatre came
up, some guy down front snorted loudly...
"If I'd have know this was a 47th Century Pinnochio I wouldn't
have wasted my money."
Still, the concept is a fascinating one. For David to plead
for its mommy (David is a mecha who seeks desperately to be
be made a REAL boy) and show emotion is, well, a major
breakthrough on the android continuum.
Are those real tears? <sniff>
What's this got to do with anything in real life? A lot.
It's a love story. And love is the most powerful force in
the Universe. Second only to the Internet, of course. ;-)
And if you love your computer, it will treat you right. I'm
serious. Treat it right. Learn to feed and care for it, and
it will respond with supreme loyalty.
Treat it with contempt, and it won't just play dead, it'll
flat out die. And perform a few illegal operations along the
Artificial Intelligence. You know, there's a third possibility.
What if the machines really do take over, and simply treat
us with indifference?
Nah, it'll never happen. But just because you're a good
person, learn something about your machines so you can
nurture them, okay? They just might love you for it!
Someone just asked for an explanation of this term. What it
means is "little program". Not a big program, like Microsoft
Word, Works, or Windows. But a little program like Notepad.
Or the sound recorder. Or any of the programs in your
System Tools folder. (Start, Programs, Accessories, System
2. "Flyout Window"
This is a silly term for a window that can fly, but only in
the outward direction. No windows can fly inward. If you have
a window that does, please see me in the office. I have a few
questions to ask you. ;-)
Seriously, a flyout window is that list of programs all arranged
on the gray or other color background you see when you cursor
over the Programs item on the Start Menu. The list "flies out"
to the right. Thus, "flyout window".
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==> 2. Tutorial: "Image Discovery"
Last week, I talked about cleaning out your cache. This week,
I want you to look at the files collecting there. You may be
in for a surprise!
Every time you view a web page, the images on that page are
downloaded to your computer. This happens automatically. The
images are stored in a special group of folders. You can go
in there and look at all the pictures!
If you have kids, or want to check up on what someone has been
viewing on the Net, this is the place to do it. Be warned... if
others have access to your computer, there's no telling what
To view the images stored on your computer from Web pages, do
1. Using My Computer icon, double click to open.
2. Open the Windows folder.
3. Open the Temporary Internet Files folder.
Inside, you'll find a lot of stuff. Images will be there, and
should have the icon of whatever image editor you have installed
on your computer. If you don't have an image editor, the icon
may look like a blue "e" or Netscape's ship's wheel icon.
Double click the image file, and will open in your image editor,
or in your browser, depending on the software installed on your
Also, check the History folder in the Windows folder. It will
also reveal a lot of information.
This is just a glimpse into the bowels of your computer. A lot of
stuff is stored there. If you want to delete the stuff you find
in the Temporary Internet Files folder, just highlight the item,
and hit the Delete key. Or highlight one item, and press Ctrl
and A keys at the same time. (Ctrl+A). This will select all of
the files... then hit the Delete key.
There are many ways to skin this cat. This is only one. If you
know of a faster way to delete files, use it.
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==> 3. Joe's Place ... "Who's Boss Around Here?"
Hi %name%, nice to talk with you.
I make no apologies whatever for talking about the Clinic again,
because I *really* believe that what we've done is a MAJOR
breakthrough in Online Technical Support.
Yeah, if you search hard enough you'll find the odd Website
offering to help you out with answers to your problems. We've
been doing that for almost a year with the Newbie Club Forum, and
many people have benefited from the advice of the really helpful
But the difference between advice from a knowledgeable enthusiast
and 90 FULL TIME Professional Support Technicians is pretty
obvious. And why do I believe the Clinic is a major breakthrough?
Because to get the same kind of PROFESSIONAL support elsewhere
costs you up to $14.95 PER QUESTION. So obviously, unless your
problem is life threatening, you won't pay.
But The Newbie Club Clinic costs just 8 CENTS A DAY, and you can
ask ANY NUMBER OF QUESTIONS you wish. So if you have a small
problem that's been annoying you for some time - like "Why does
it take so long for my computer to boot up", or "Why do my email
attachments only open occasionally" - ask at the Clinic and the
thorn is permanently removed! And of course, when something
really catastrophic happens - and believe me it will sooner or
later - you'll have Professional Technicians on hand to solve it
You probably have car breakdown insurance, home fire insurance,
and health insurance, so why not Computer Rage insurance. Because
that's what a Clinic Subscription really is - insurance that
takes the frustration out of learning new software, and
Applications like Windows or Microsoft Word. Insurance that gives
you peace of mind that you will NEVER be left on your own when
you need technical help of any kind. 24 hours a day, and 7 days a
week. But unlike your other Insurance policies, you're encouraged
to use it as much as possible - for only 8 cents a day!
THAT'S why it's a Major Breakthrough!
See if you agree .... http://newbieclub.com/clinic
One of the Newbie Club's much remarked upon strengths is our
customer support. And our Customer Support Dream Girl is Jann
The other day, I found out what keeps her attitude so upbeat,
when having to deal with so much. You know what she said to
Joe, I LOVE IT!
And that's why she's so successful at it.
At the moment she's in California researching a new Project for
us, and while she's there she's doing a photo shoot for herself.
In case you didn't know, she's also a professional photographer
and a highly qualified lady in many other fields. Makes you sick
doesn't it :-) But we're so pleased to have her on the team that
we sent her off to work in the sunshine.
Come to think of it, who's Boss around here? Tom and I can't even
find time to keep up with our present workload, never mind
flying off to California!
Something wrong somewhere.
Anyway, you may not be aware that she wrote an excellent ebook
for us which is proving extremely popular. It's all about Digital
Cameras and how to understand them. And Jann's experience comes
through on every page. It's called Digicam MAGIC! and you can
read about it here ... http://newbieclub.com/digicam
Hey Tom. Who's idea was it to send her off to California?
Keep smilin' %name%.
PS I didn't really want to go to California anyway. It's much
better working here in front of my computer at 11:30 pm.
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Some Zip programs are frustratingly confusing to use. But it's
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'Unzip Wizard' is so simple it's impossible to go wrong. That's
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The Newbie Club has arranged a special discount for you at this
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<a href="http://newbieclub.com/wizard">click here</a>.
This is a stunner!
---------------- "MAGIC!" ----------------
Many people believe their magic mouse is the be-and-end-all of
modern technology. Click this, click that, right click, left
click, double click, somersault and middle click - magic! And
who can blame them? After all they've never been shown a better
way! But the savvy ones learn all about those mysterious
keyboard keys, and their lives - and creativity - are
transformed. Read about The Newbie Club's best seller
'Keyboard MAGIC! and transform your computer habits - it's so
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<a href="http://newbieclub.com/keyboard">click here</a>.
==> 4. Tutorial: "Changing Your Resolution"
Do you see things as well as you'd like? Are the images on your
computer screen too big, or too little? You can adjust all of
this very easily. Here's how.
Your computer has three popular screen sizes... measured in
something called pixels. A pixel is a tiny dot that makes up
the stuff you see. One dot. One pixel. (Pixel is short for
picture element, and picture was shortened to pix.)
Top three popular screen resolutions:
#1. 640 x 480 pixels
#2. 800 x 600 pixels
#3. 1024 x 768 pixels
Now, if your monitor is displaying stuff at resolution #1,
things will be quite large. You may want to change the
settings to 800 x 600. Or, if your monitor is at 1024 x 768,
you may want to decrease the setting if everything looks too
small for you.
1. Right click a blank part of the desktop and select
Properties from the context menu.
2. In the Display Properties box, click the Settings tab. You
see the Screen area section? There's a slider bar with 'Less'
on the left, and 'More' on the right. Under that, you'll see
the number of pixels you are working with. Change the slider,
click OK, and follow the instructions.
You should be shown a preview of what things will look like,
and if you like it, accept the new setting. You may have to
restart your computer for this to take affect.
The number of pixels you can view, and the color settings will
be determined by the power of your video card. In the 'Colors'
area, there are 16, 256, High Color (16 bit) and True Color (32
bit) listed. Depending on the power of your video card, you
may not be able to use True Color.
The idea is to get comfortable, and make your computer as easy
to use as possible. You shouldn't have to squint and strain
our eyes to comfortably read your screen.
For pictures, see http://newbieclub.com/resolution
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==> 5. Linda's Office Corner: "PowerPoint Animation"
Make Them PowerPoint Slide Shows MOVE, Baby!
First, let me address the question a lot of you sent me
regarding my mention in my tip on the PowerPoint Viewer that
you can get from Microsoft for free if you want to send your
Slide Shows to someone who doesn't have PowerPoint.
Here's the URL for those who want this viewer, and who are
brave enough to tackle it:
**Yes, that's a long URL and it won't work unless you copy it
all and paste it manually into you Web Browser's Address Bar**
Now, onto something else regarding PowerPoint:
The key to making PowerPoint Slide Shows that really grab your
audience, is NOT the material included, and NOT the pretty
pictures and graphs, and NOT the fun sounds. The key is how
you animate your slides.
To understand how PowerPoint's animation works, go into the
Slide Show menu and click on "Custom Animation". In the box in
the upper left of this dialog box, you see a list of all the
objects PowerPoint sees in your slide. Check off the objects
you want to animate. Then, click on one of them so it is
selected and click on the "Effects" tab at the bottom. Play
around with all of the different settings, then hit the
"Preview" button to see how it looks.
Let's say you have a clipart picture in your slide of three
people running down a road. If you go back to your slide, you
will see when you click on this picture, a box appears around
the whole picture. This is because PowerPoint sees it as one
object. If you want each person to run onto the slide
individually, click once on the picture, then click on the Word
"Draw" on your Drawing Toolbar at the bottom of your screen.
Select "Ungroup". PowerPoint will give you a warning that you
are changing the format of your picture. Just click on "Yes".
Now you will see a bunch of individual boxes instead of the one
large box. This means PowerPoint now sees all of these as
Now, go back to that Custom Animations box and see how many
objects are listed. You can now animate all of them individually
What a difference this makes, eh?
Hang in there!
Visit Linda at http://www.personal-computer-tutor.com
Read about the 2 'MS Word MAGIC' ebooklets Linda wrote for The
Newbie Club at http://newbieclub.com/wordmagic
<a href="http://newbieclub.com/wordmagic">click here</a>.
So you're not such a Newbie after all? Like to know what makes
Windows act the way it does? Then this ebook will give you a
quick, easy understanding of your PC's Brain. It's called 'The
Registry For Newbies' and you can read all about it here...
<a href="http://newbieclub.com/rfncopy">click here</a>.
See Techie-Speak translated into Newbie-Speak by an expert!
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